Black Hair Ponytails

I'm terrible to edit my writing, so I need help. This is not the actual start of my first chapter, just one hand. I need to know if there should be a more detailed description of the amount of information ...

Forcing the last piece of bread in his mouth, Audrey hoisted his bag over his shoulder and walked toward the door. She rolled her eyes in irritation when she saw her Nan Persian black cat, Blossom, blocking the path of the front door, almost like she knew she was going. A whistle rolled off the tongue of Audrey, who caught unawares Blossom and sent to rest in the room Nan.
"Evil Cat." Audrey muttered, leaving the prison that she called home.
Close the metal door behind her, she began to walk on the hill and green to make his way to school. Audrey took his tangle of blonde hair back to tie it tightly into a ponytail, to stop waving it in the wind in May This was part of his daily walk to school she loved most. The hilly bending were misleading, making it look like prairie stretched for miles here and Audrey felt as if she was leaving civilization behind for a few minutes she was walking along the curve.
Audrey rubbed his hands, the spring air creating a layer of Goosebumps on her skin, which means that winter was on its way. Packing his red scarf around his neck, Audrey felt the familiar smell of nature. She sighed as she reached the last hill and the traffic noise broke out of his reverie peaceful.
The road is returned to his school and was visible to the main street.

In addition, it was annoying to read? I hate books lying around and talk about things we do not need to know (but the important thing is actually chat to the plot), but then if there was not a little bit, I don ' would have nothing in my first chapter. So what do you think and it is not enough description for what happens? If not, how do you think I could change or do you have any advice? Thank you a bunch, I appreciate it.

~ Nicole.xx

I remember the book the young girl fell into her dream before waking.

I read it several times now. If you were honestly concerned about it not enough details, Ne. There are many, the cat thing you said was actually related conspiracy thats so great. And you were able to let us know she does not like his family life with something nice and easy without exaggeration.

For the rest, it did sometimes seem to be abit much. Look below commentary ponytail. He almost right on. It's as if you were trying a bit too much good and there. I do not think it was bad by any means, but you can pull it back a little. As regards the text itself, it was not exciting, but it was not boring. There was more development, then nothing else. He gave us a better idea of who is Audrey, she loves nature and is not afraid to be alone. You told us things about her that comes into play later probally or atleast we can relate to her more. I do not worry, it's a good start.

Also im going on a few hours of sleep so if all this was confused, I apologize

I like it very much! In fact, it would be interesting to read. I think you're going well so far. :)

This is not me trying to be rude, but honestly, I think you have too much description! The best way to keep the attention of a reader is not to go into much detail because then the player may hang on one aspect of the story, so he can begin to seem a bit pompous and boring if there is too much detail set.

For example: "Audrey took his tangle of blond hair back and tie it tightly into a ponytail, to stop waving it in the gale of May"

One could write with the same impression, that something l.