Hawaiian Hair

This question has been on my mind a lot lately and I'm being really honest, because I'm crazy for thinking this way, but it bothers me.

I recently discovered the story of my family and made all the women in my family of the late 1700s until slavery was ended the children with white men! On both sides of my family! I felt fking GROSS. Especially since people often ask me if I'm mixed! All I could think of was the generations of my ancestors have been raped and I carry the evidence. My father looked Hawaiian and golden tan skin, white spots, dirty blond hair and blue / green eyes. For me it is black, but I feel weird about it now. I took a history class where my teacher spoke Slave women raped and I felt uncomfortable. I remember he spoke I looked at my skin and it's just a weird feeling knowing that what he meant is that my ancestors suffered. People always say slavery was so long, but it really was not. I'm black, I feel like I should look more black, not "mixed". Do I sound crazy??

Then I developed a strange obsession with Africans in the past year! I really, really like men and African women a lot! I was wondering if its another form of self-hate that because if I could change my ethnicity I would do without hesitation. I want my children, even in Africa. My dream is to marry an African man who has a country to regain his inheritance to have children who belong to a place other than America. : (So this is really weird??

Wow. This is a very personal and profound. I'm white. Whiter than snow. However, your question comes at a very fundamental rights that we all have in common. Are you your genetics? We all have much to both proud and ashamed of our ancestors in any race. Personally, I think that genetics is the base or a clean slate we all start at birth. The experience of our form of the environment including the subconscious of the child who grew up in what we become. If I was born into a family of black slaves in the 1800s I have the same mental problems and prospects as they did, I think. If a black child was born on the circumstances of a white slave owning family in the 1800s, he or she would have common attitudes to the white family. So I think we all genetically the same mud (or gold) running in our veins - so look at your skin as the badge of the struggle and adventure - but look to the inside your mind and heart that the true source of your value.

It is difficult for anyone to grasp the idea of their ancestors being raped so I'll give you that.

But if you hate white blood cells that came from those who date IR because they wanted then his self-hatred.

do not give your first feeling that much power over you, you love. beautiful.i you do not really have a good answer for you. try to be happy, and forgive.try a stance against all prejudice.wow don 't know what to say to help you.

no its not weired. I think you just shocked that you have heard of your past. you can not change the past so you have to learn to accept it. I hope you find your dream African man =)

It was not quite rape, a good amount was consensual.

The first step is to love you.

I can relate to this much. I do not think his self-hatred.

LOL @ Crazy Patsy

u seriously are you kidding me, get a F * king grip.

Yes, you do kind of crazy right now.

(:

Why would anyone feel "gross" to have Caucasian blood?
Everyone is mixed with something kind of blood that we might not even know. For this reason we have conquered all, but people seem to forget it and think it is "an art